Tuesday, February 19, 2013

Sanctimonious....Sanctimommy

 There is usually at least one in every mom's life. Whether it be your neighbor, fellow PTA member, online contact or your sister-in-law. She is there. Laying in wait, just waiting for you to say something that is so not an AP approved statement and ready to "educate" you on how that is just not the best you can do as a parent.  They are the stuff mommy wars are made out of and always looking to out mom everyone else.


She says stuff like "I just can't imagine a woman choosing to feed her baby something as non-nutritional as formula instead of her own breast like nature intended" and "Oh, you let little Johnny eat off of those cheap plastic plates with cartoon characters? Haven't you heard about all the toxins seeping out of the plastics they are made with? They might cause cancer but it's your choice I suppose if you think they are ok." There is always a guilt trip if you don't agree with her or she goes on and on and on and never knows when to stop.

She will often reference main stream organizations like the AAP, WHO or other popular sources like Dr. Sears. "Those faces your baby makes while trying solids are cute but his solids should be limited till six months, even the AAP recommends that". UUUGGHHHH..recommendations are not law and I know my baby better than anyone else I know can read his cues for readiness. Thank you very much; not that I was even asking in the first place!


Let me stop here and throw this out there, and I've said this before. Every mom and dad should absolutely do whatever works for their child/children and family as a whole.Whether that is baby wearing, circumcision, non-vaccinating, or formula feeding.  Everyone has choices and those choices are our own business as long as those choices aren't illegal or abusive.  

Now if someone ASKS you about your choices or where you learned about XY and Z that is different. Educate away, now is your chance to carry on conversation about all things natural and homemade. Un-solicited advice is not a conversation however.

SO BUTT OUT Sanctimommies!!!!!  Un-solicited advice is usually un-wanted.




Sunday, February 17, 2013

Things I said I would never do

It's amazing how much of a super duper parent you are before you have kids. You tell people "when I finally have a baby I will feed them only breast milk and organic baby food made by ME". Everyone knows that formula and store bought jar food is full of preservatives, GMO's and pure evilness.

...then that baby came and he didn't give two cents about sucking on a boobies. No matter what hold, position or pillow he absolutely REFUSED! My next thought was "this sucks but no biggie, I'll just pump and still give him what's best". I was going to do that anyway once I went back to work.  Ha ha, yea; no luck. Producing around six ounces a day doesn't feed a baby. I tried boosting my supply by several ways and that only helped by maybe half an ounce per pump session if any at all. Still not enough to feed a baby. I gave Calvin what I could until it was all gone but long story short he became a formula baby. 



Being a stay at home mom was not a financial option for us. I knew this from the beginning but I had a perfect plan and schedule formed in my mind how I was going to do it all. Then reality hit. I couldn't do it all. The little jars of food made their way into the shopping cart. 

Preservaties and GMO's...oh the perils!! What does GMO stand for anyway? Gentically...modified??...something???. I dont' know, but whatever it is it hasn't killed Calvin yet. He seems to be doing just fine and thriving on the jared evil. 

                                ---------------------------------------------------


"Every mommy blog on the internet says bottle and wiper warmers are just junk; so I'm not going to bother with spending my money on them"

Take a wild guess what made their way into our house. Just guess...


                                

Yep, those "junk items". Junk my butt! The wiper warmer came first; the day we came home from the hospital actually.  I still wasn't sold but Will insisted on it and the first time I was hit with a surprise golden shower in the middle of the night I was thankful for friends who helped get Will to the store. 

The bottle warmer came after about a month. After feedings being a fuss sessions because he would hit hot spots in the bottles and after burning his mouth a few times we got a bottle warmer. World of difference. Never heat bottles in the microwave unless you really don't have a choice. 

                          -----------------------------------------------------------

"Bottles that mimic the natural breast will be my primary bottles to minimize nipple confusion and they prevent air bubbles too"

He rejected those too along with me.  These are Calvin's favorite. Avent is just as great at preventing air bubbles and gas with their air lock system and it's less parts to wash compared to some other bottles. Actually just one part, the air lock band.

                                     


         ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


"Calvin won't know TV and cartoons. That's just lazy parenting"

A picture speaks a thousand words....



                                       --------------------------------------------------------------


"Infant seats are such a waste and travel systems are just for looks. They just outgrow them in a year and you're spending another $100+ on another car seat. Convertibles are the way to go, besides moving a newborn/infant back and forth between car seat to stroller for every stop isn't that hard once I get used to it."


See, the box even says it's ok for infants 5 pounds and up, so why wouldn't it be ok?


Horrible idea. I felt like an idiot and I knew I had made a mistake within five minutes of having him in it on the ride home from the hospital. No head support whatsoever, I had to hold his head up and rolled up blankets didn't help. Just buy the travel system and don't waste your time trying to cheat the system. No pun intended I promise. 





This is still a good seat don't get me wrong but not for a newborn. It became ok around the 3 month mark when he developed good head control. All convertibles are rather sizable and eventually you will need one but also think about how soon you want this huge seat in your car and which model will fit in your car. This one we can get squeezed into my mom wagon but it barely fits properly. If it doesn't fit properly it diminishes the safety qualities.  I'm not an expert so do your own research but in a nutshell; there you have it. It has to fit and be installed properly. We keep our Safety 1st seat in the SUV. Buying a car seat is more than just walking into Babies R Us and picking out your favorite color.



So after 3 weeks of sitting in the back seat with Calvin and holding his head up I admitted defeat and borrow an infant carrier from a friend. When I got back to work and needed the second car seat (one for each car) you bet this is what I got!



Just an FYI about infant seats. The AAP's current recommendation for rear facing is now two years. Due to this change in the last year the car seat manufacturers and paying attention and *most* new infant seats are coming out designed to be used for two years! So unless you have a kid that's growing up to be a pro basketball star no worry about buying another seat in 9 mos - 1 year later. Graco makes a model that is marketed for up to two years (Graco Click Connect 40) and it's the only one with that claim but a lot have the height and weight for up to two years. I wanted this one but I couldn't find it in stores yet when I needed a seat so I got the Graco Snug Ride 35. I'm happy with it, I think he will be in it for a while and I do love the color :)!



**Again, do your own research and results may vary depending on your individual child**

WHEW! Car seats are complicated!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------


"I'm planning a natural birth with no epidural; maybe some IV pain drugs at the end if I feel I need them. Women have been doing this for thousands of years and I don't think it's as hard some people make it out to be"



Yes, that is an OR, scalpels, Calvin in the middle of blood and a HORRID blue curtain blocking my view....nothing like I planned. 



Sh*t happens sometimes that you don't plan on, which leads to more sh*t happening. I completely, grossly under estimated just how trying to labor would take me down a few notches and how vulnerable I really would be. Lessons learned. That's all I'm going to really say about that on this blog.

                   -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


"After reading about it I don't think I will use rice cereal. I think it's void of nutrition and oatmeal has better nutritional value"





I DID NOT budge on this one :). Despite how many funny looks I get or get asked "who says". Just like the jared baby food it's my business what I choose as long as Calvin is growing healthy and strong. 


So you see, lots of things do not go as planned based on your individual babies needs and individual needs and experiences of each family. What works for one may not work for the next. There is no right or wrong to this stuff. Do what's best for your family and screw the rest! 


Why yes, I do love pictures. Pictures are fun and in the words of The Cat in the Hat, "it's fun to have fun". 


XOXO...Mindy 








Saturday, February 9, 2013

Rainbow Babies

Calvin is my Rainbow baby. I have a Facebook based network of Rainbow mommies. Are you wondering what the heck are all this rainbow talk is about? It's ok, most people wonder too. It kinda makes us feel special,  like our own secret little club; but on the other hand we don't want to be a secret. We want awareness and recognition for our sorrow,  pregnancy fears and miracles.  Allow me to explain.......


"Rainbow Babies" is the understanding that the beauty of a rainbow does not negate the ravages of the storm. When a rainbow appears, it doesn't mean the storm never happened or that the family is not still dealing with its aftermath. What it means is that something beautiful and full of light has appeared in the midst of the darkness and clouds. Storm clouds may still hover but the rainbow provides a counterbalance of color, energy and hope.



Are you still confused? The storm represents a pregnancy loss (ANY pregnancy loss), stillborn or infant loss. Loss is a storm of emotions, storm of confusion, and a storm of sadness. These losses become our Angels who were as it's said "too beautiful for earth". After ever storm eventually comes a rainbow. A colorful, bright ray of light through the storm clouds and rain. It's believed that our Angels send the Rainbow at just the right time. 

October 15th is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Day and the whole month is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month. On this day pink is worn if you lost a girl, blue if lost a boy and yellow if the gender was not known. Balloon releases are held by families and sometimes by small communities of angel mommies. The day and month was founded in 1985 by Ronald Reagan  It's been in place over twenty years and few know about it. October is most widely known as Breast Cancer Awareness month. Any kind of cancer is a serious matter and the cause is important, but just know it's not the only cause October is about.  This is why we want awareness. Twenty-eight years is a long time to still have few know what October 15th represents. 


Boobies are nice and should be saved...but remember our Angel Babies too! 








My RAINBOW

        


Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Introduction

First things first......meet Calvin my Rainbow baby. I'll get more into that symbol in a future blog.





Welcome to our new blog about all things Calvin and baby related. There are many parenting ideas and philosophies out there today and everyone swears their favorite methods are is THE BEST. It can be down right overwhelming for a new parent or even a seasoned one.

I've been blogging for a while during the TTC and birth process but it morphed into my outlet for my struggles with PPD. When I decide to write about parenting and my 2 cents and various topics and products I don't want my most deep down feelings available for the whole universe to see. I only share it with certain people.

Anywho..sign up for email alerts and stay tuned!


XOXOX